its whatever

-so today's june 4th, techincally the 5th cuzh its like 12:37am. but yea it was richard's birthday. he turns 19 today, so happy birthday to you and also jessica marie. thinkin about age and life just makes me realize i'll be 18 by the end of this yr [nov 26th]. although it seems like i may have the whole world to worry about life, but when you think about it - you can never predict the future, you'll never know whats gonna happen if you try to plan it out. planning things out are meant for change because things will never go as followed. thinking about ageing and life, makes me want to change so much and grow up. makes me want to find love and settle down, now im not talkin about marriage and kids, but a long relationship sounds about right at this moment, something i've longed for, for a while now. im tired of waiting, i see all these couples and its like when will it be my turn. i guess im not as lucky, but most will say i am lucky to be single because i have my whole life, but you dont know that, i can die the next week and never feel what you may feel. so your taken, okay........so what. some may think its a bad thing because of the arguements and the fightin, the disagreements and the jealousy. but i think those who have that special someone are the lucky ones, because like i said , one can die in the next week and never feel what love brings to the table. yes it has its ups and downs but in the end workin it out together and just havin that person at the end of the day when the sun goes down can be the best feelin ever, and that person who can die next week can never experience that. dont take anything for regret or any resentment. its like tht saying you'll never know what you have until you lose it.

someone has got me feeling some type of way;; i can 't display it and put it out on the table. but that person has really got me thinking, but it doesnt even matter now.

time to say goodbye................to him
&& everyone else;; im going to sleep now