the power

ahhh i can't seem to sleep. it is now 2:07am. and its just i have so much on my mind. no idea where to start, what to do, or even how to act. ever wish you had the power to read one's mind, ever wonder what someone is thinkin, what they think of you, && how they feel. especialy its times when people all over the world walk around with smiles, and its when you least know , that its fake. theres more to a person then a smile, most people are good at hiding their emotions. i on the other hand suck at it. i seriously break down so easily. i feel like im having a melt down, crazy thing is i dont know why. well its not that i dont know why, its just i have so much on my mind. im not sure which one of those causes this melt down. or maybe i do, its just something i can't speak of. but i feel like im stuck in between;; confuzed and dont know what to do or what to feel. blehhh maybe i need to let go. then i wouldnt feel so in between or even trapped.

on the other hand, i've been thinkin about relationships alot lately as well. and all types of relationships, from friends, to potential boyfriends in the future, and family. i feel like i either think it over to much, which i do alot. i over think and go over board into assumptions. or i just put way to much effort into keeping a relationship thats not there no more. thats over. so why should i keep trying if they're not willin to put in effort.

&& thats the reason why i give up;; i show no love;; im cold hearted;; act stubborn and stuck up- but its life, what more can i say.