as i ponder

_okay so yea its like 4:10am;; and as i ponder myself on other people's blogspot pages. its a coincidence that one of the pages i ran into was an old friend (no names], cuzh nothings ever as private as you think especialy if your on here blogging. as i read her page, honestly when i think about the times we shared for about 13 yrs or so;; i can't seem to remember a single moment i'd cherish for life with her. which is pretty sad to say, but its a good thing. not remembering the bad things in the past, all i remember was i always put forth more effort into the friendship and never got anything in return. the one day i needed her, she wasn't even there or said she couldnt be there. im laying in bed sick to death for like 2 weeks and can't even eat, and you say you cant be here for me. yea thanks your a great friend, yet i foundout she was at the house a block away from mines. what kinda bullshyt is that. although she wasn't there for me, i was still her friend. then one day a rumor spilled that was said about me. and supposively i wanted to fight her. im not a fighter, i express my anger in different ways. why be immature, fight and get a few bruises over something not worth your life. point made its not.

sometimes i even think about hittin her up to patch things up and resolve it, cuz we never even spoke about the situation but just stoped talking. then again you can say if one really cared they'd already made the effort and step up to the plate already. so who knows. i guess its true when you think about it, how many friends have you made throughout your life, now think how many of them do you still even talk to. as for me, none sadly. yes old friends are soon enough new enemies.

_i kept going back and forth on blogspot and myspace of course. so tell me why when i went on myspace this guy kept sending me messages subject as "asap".....clearly under my display pic it says "nooo messages" yet i guess people like him are slow minded and has no intellectual thought in mind. but what triggers their mind is the thought of sex, cuz his 1st message said something that goes like this " if i was your man, you wont be able to walk cuzh i'll break your back or blah,blah,blah." then he asked if i lived in vegas and then the last message he said i was stuckup and asked if i went to some high school in vegas cuzh he thinks he knows me.

why do guys even bother hollering, coming at a girl with no type of sensabilty at all?? why come at a girl all perveted and know your not gonna get an answer and then get madd at her. theres no one other then yourself to be madd at. its obvious guys like that;; have no standards and need to get some higher level of knowlege.

signing out_
I guess its time for me to go to sleep now cuzh its 4:30am. yeaaa
until then i'll be back with more to talk about;; hopefully something excitinh happens in the day